Working with Aggressive Children

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Working with Aggressive Children Lilly Landikusic LMFT, Founder and Director, EMPOWERMENT COUNSELING SERVICES Talon Greeff MMHC, Director of Residential Care, UTAH YOUTH VILLAGE This preparation and extra assets can be found at www.utahparenting.org

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Overview Introduction Stories Dynamics of hostility Youth issues Pre-blowup Home environment Setup youth for achievement Avoiding power battles During the explode Steps for quieting Things you ought to do Post-blowup Writing assignments Other Behavioral Techniques Conclusion

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Introduction Cody, 8 year-old kid, assaulted sister and mother Charlie, 15 year-old young lady, verbally manhandling guardians and kin, dangers, always pushing limits utilizing outrage State mental healing center teenager who was seriously formatively postponed 9:40

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Dynamics of Aggression Research exhibits that mediated youth feel they have next to zero control over their lives Often feel they can't settle on any choices Many youth have been moved "spontaneously" They are disappointed and furious at "the framework" They accuse their folks, caseworkers, temporary parents, teachers, judges and any other individual they accept is in charge of their despondency Research additionally demonstrates that they feel there are two ways they can take control of their lives: latent resistance or physical animosity

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Other Dynamics of Aggression They may have seen hostility displayed by their relatives and copy it They may have tried different things with hostility as a conduct and keep on using it They may have a physiological issue and it might be more troublesome for them to oversee feelings Progress here requires a more drawn out view—prompt outcomes regularly don't give prompt change 9:45

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Youth Issues Poor communicators, have a tendency to be less verbal Lower than normal scholarly working Have "outrage issues" Difficulty with change Difficulty with connections or connection We can help any adolescent with hostility even the individuals who are extremely lower working

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Pre-Blowup Home setup Systems to share control Use family gatherings to setup principles and give input Use an administrator framework for youth authority in the home Weekly family exercises They are not earned, everybody gets the chance to take an interest similarly Purpose is to fabricate connections by having a ton of fun together Weekly one on one time with a grown-up Have fun, show a comical inclination

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Pre-Blowup Home setup Adequate rest for youth or tyke Reasonable, implemented sleep times Medication as important Take time to put youngsters to bed with quieting schedules Story time Back rubbing Melatonin has been utilized with achievement Home schedules and "musicality" Develop an acknowledged timetable Relaxed, home beat, permit little aggravations 9:50

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Pre-Blowup Setup youth or kid for achievement Assess drug Observe tyke or youth Determine standard and record on date-book Document youth conduct on kitchen date-book Give clear, short guidelines when a kid is baffled or bombshell Put your basic things away or away, help you remain quiet

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Pre-Blowup Be clear by they way you will handle forceful conduct Have a get arrange worked out with your life partner and case manager Be ready to portray it to the young or tyke Clear rewards and results for taking a period out or for declining to take a period out Suggestion: Shorten time-out if taken instantly Suggestion: Assign an errand for declining to take a period out Suggestion: Take away benefits for declining to finish a task

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Pre-Blowup Practice vital abilities or practices day by day Practice negative outcomes, similar to time-out The adolescent ought to rapidly do the time-out Practice "controlling feelings" Deep breathing Counting Thinking about results Steps to honing aptitudes with youth Avoid control battles by giving decisions Prepares kid and parent for forceful circumstances 9:55

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Steps for Practicing with Youth Describe the conduct you are showing Give a reason utilizing an if/then articulation Demonstrate the conduct for the kid Have the kid take part in the conduct and practice three times Reward

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Avoiding Power Struggles Based in giving and clarifying decisions For instance, if a young says you can't make them clean their room. Your reaction would be, "I comprehend it's not enjoyable to clean your room and you have a decision. You can pick not to clean your room keeping you from staring at the TV or you can clean your room and sit in front of the TV sooner. It's dependent upon you" Let the adolescent know they have the decision and underline it's dependent upon them. We can't truly drive anybody to do anything. We wouldn't have any desire to do that since then learning doesn't occur. 10:00

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Steps to Avoiding Power Struggles Youth says, "I won't… You can't make me… No..," Empathy explanation, "I would be more enjoyable to sit in front of the TV Explain that young has a decision, "You have a decision." Explain the negative decision and its result, "You can decide to not do your errand now and lose TV"

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Steps to Avoiding Power Struggles Explain the positive decision and its outcome, "Or you can get right on the task and sit in front of the TV when you are finished." If essential, give youth time and come back to see what the decision is, "You have to begin in the following five minutes." If the adolescent settles on the positive decision then acclaim and reward. If not, then force a negative result, for example, killing the TV. 10:05

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Things to Remember Do not stroll on eggshells or let tyke/youth prepare you to oblige their conduct You will take every necessary step, either now or later Have low resistances with little outcomes, in the event that you consequate interfering with, verbally abusing and shouting then you will manage less physical hostility Negotiating is alright, the length of it is not pay off or shakedown Bribe is a reward which precedes the conduct

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During the Blowup Stay around 10 feet far from the adolescent De-acceleration starts with conveyance of an outcome Youth may fit of rage to keep away from an outcome Deliver one outcome, extra tasks or lose benefits for a day Don't heap outcomes on or surmise that conveying an outcome will bring about consistence Steps for quieting down youth 10:10

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Steps for Calming the Youth Express compassion or acclaim Describe conduct you require them to quit Yelling Swearing Stomping around Describe what you need them to do Short guidelines Pleasant voice Don't expect consistence however adulate approximations Repeat initial three stages until youth quiet down Allow time for them to quiet down

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During the Blowup Only talk about the youngster's conduct, not the issue or circumstance that started the explode Ignore any "bedeviling" "You're more pleasant to alternate children" "You are so uncalled for" "You don't comprehend what it resembles these days" Monitor your own particular conduct Remove any crowd Explain how youth can resolve the circumstance 10:15

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During the Blow-up Know when to limit Hurting self or others Severe property harm Know how to control Don't control on the off chance that you can't, will exacerbate circumstance Add charges to youth Plan for bolster It is your business to deal with your childhood in your home Lean on assets for important help

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During the Blow-up Know when to call the police Teenager strikes parent "You have to put the blade down in 5 seconds or I will need to call the police" Youth needs to discover that familial viciousness is unsuitable Inhibits guardians capacity to convey and uphold results Severe property harm Take youth property as result, youth can't be permitted to harm home to get property back Damage the young can't settle, repair or make compensation Severe potential mischief or harm Stealing an auto Taking a weapon 10:20

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Things you Should Do Track youth who are forceful Avoid blocking ways out or regions of travel Appear casual and quiet Slouch Lean against a divider Break eye contact Remain around 10 feet away—no closer! Recall that—you are in control and in control It involves time You don't have to persuade them you are in control

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Post Blow-up Wait a critical time, typically a few hours or until the following day, and have the adolescent practice what they ought to do as opposed to exploding It ought to be an unbiased time that is helpful for you and the young Keep the practice short and oppose addressing The adolescent ought to practice three times Have a reward for rehearsing that is utilized rapidly. Lessen the outcome, treat, additional time out of bed 10:25

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Post-blowup Apply result that is sensible, not rebuffing Suggestion: youth lose benefits for a large portion of a day, lose benefits for an entire day Do a mix of outcomes like a noteworthy errand, a few pretends and composed assignments Teach with the outcome—instruct an expertise that will help the adolescent abstain from exploding later on

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Writing Assignments and Other Techniques Have youth round out worksheet on SODAS Complete Aggression Log or quieting down worksheet Practice passionate control procedures Counting to ten Thinking about results Thinking about what you need Thinking about something lovely Thought-ceasing/Taking a moment Time self out Put charming things in your room Sing positive melody to yourself Develop a positive saying to rehash to yourself 10:30

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SODAS SITUATION: One sentence depicting the circumstance OPTIONS: List no less than three choices accessible DISADVANTAGES: List no less than three hindrances for every choice ADVANTAGES: List no less than three points of interest for every alternative SOLUTION: Pick one of the choices

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Calming Down Worktable

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Other Behavioral Techniques Differential fortification of contradictory conduct Focus on instructing aptitudes that make it difficult to do the negative conduct You can't holler in the event that you are talking in a typical voice Differential rein

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